What can MAGA’s do to stop Biden from cheating again?https://joellipman.com/articles/_other-misc/jokes/what-can-maga’s-do-to-stop-biden-from-cheating-again.html

28 August 2024 guy goes to a bar and is served by a robot bartender. The robot says, "What'll you have?" and the guy says, "A martini." He then gets the best martini he's ever tasted. The robot says, "What's your IQ?" The guy says, "167." The robot proceeds to chat...

• Type: Article
• Author: Joel Lipman
• Category: Jokes
• Language: *

Zoho Deluge: Setup an API Connection for InvokeURLhttps://joellipman.com/articles/crm/zoho/zoho-deluge-setup-an-api-connection-for-invokeurl.html

12 August 2020 your client/customer is using in Zoho, check the domain and specifically the top-level-domain (TLD) part. For example, if it says zoho.com, then this means the US datacenter. If it says zoho.eu, then this is the EU datacenter. If it says zoho.in, then...

• Type: Article
• Author: Joel Lipman
• Category: Zoho
• Language: *

Performance Report - Background colors based on dataset valueshttps://joellipman.com/articles/microsoft/ssrs/green-red-background-colors-based-on-dataset-values.html

02 December 2011 this is just how I did it. This may look like a horrible report which would fail an accessibility test but visually it says straight away which is the better report; and when comparing to the previous runs (using a second dataset) you can tell where...

• Type: Article
• Author: Joel Lipman
• Category: SQL Server Reporting Services
• Language: en-GB

Zoho People: Reject an Application for Leave in Deluge based on Criteriahttps://joellipman.com/articles/crm/zoho/zoho-people-reject-an-application-for-leave-in-deluge.html

10 December 2020 system will require a return value for this function: // return response as ok popup (doesn't really do anything: just says "Record added successfully") v_OutputMessage = "Thank you for submitting your application for leave."; c_Response = Collection();...

• Type: Article
• Author: Joel Lipman
• Category: Zoho
• Language: *

Zoho Creator: Public URL of an Image field / Upload to Shopify APIhttps://joellipman.com/articles/crm/zoho/zoho-creator-public-url-of-an-image-field-upload-to-shopify-api.html

17 October 2021 version of the image and the below is how I achieved this. How? First-off, let me list the various formats that Zoho Creator says that public link exists. Let's say I have a field called Main_Photo and this is in a form called Portal_Listing with a...

• Type: Article
• Author: Joel Lipman
• Category: Zoho
• Language: *

Zoho Deluge: Nested Catch Statementshttps://joellipman.com/articles/crm/zoho/zoho-deluge-nested-catch-statements.html

04 February 2025 } catch(e) { info "Couldn't convert 'Bar' to an integer"; } } Pushing the product beyond it's design Note that before anyone says I'm only try catching a doomed conversion from string to integer; I've applied this to an actual invokeURL command rather...

• Type: Article
• Author: Joel Lipman
• Category: Zoho
• Language: *

Database Error: Unable to connect to the database: Could not connect to MySQLhttps://joellipman.com/articles/database/mysql/database-error-unable-to-connect-to-the-database-could-not-connect-to-mysql.html

25 September 2009 checked your database connection details, I find what FisherC said below is the most probable cause for the error. FisherC says: I have the same problem, but I'm not sure for the same reasons. I installed the standard 1.5 installation package. I have...

• Type: Article
• Author: Joel Lipman
• Category: MySQL
• Language: en-GB

Uninstalling AEC Central and installing Community Builderhttps://joellipman.com/articles/cms/joomla/uninstalling-aec-central-and-installing-community-builder.html

20 January 2010 admin panel 4. Go to Extensions > Install/Uninstall 5. Install com_comprofiler.zip (remember to wait till it confirms it says "Installation finished") 6. Go back to Extensions > Install/Uninstall 7. Install mod_cblogin.zip 8. Install...

• Type: Article
• Author: Joel Lipman
• Category: Joomla
• Language: *

Windows 7: System Clock is constantly going out of synchttps://joellipman.com/articles/microsoft/windows-os/windows-7-system-clock-is-constantly-going-out-of-sync.html

28 January 2010 Change the Default Update Interval If your clock is constantly out of sync even though it says the sync was successful, the problem could be that your computer is losing time because of a system clock problem. A workaround in this instance is to change...

• Type: Article
• Author: Joel Lipman
• Category: Windows OS
• Language: *

Joes Quicklist Weblinks (JQW)https://joellipman.com/component/content/article/joes-quicklist-weblinks-jqw.html?catid=40

03 July 2011 (unknown number of FREE prints - Tested: Add [http://open.thumbshots.org/image.pxf?url=]) FreeWebsiteThumbnails.com (says "FREE" - Tested: Add [http://img.freewebsitethumbnails.com/?u=]) So what to do with all of these? Well sometimes a service can be...

• Type: Article
• Author: Joel Lipman
• Category: Product Documentation
• Language: *

Basic Webpage Controls with JavaScript / COMhttps://joellipman.com/articles/automation/autohotkey/basic-webpage-controls-with-javascript-com.html

05 July 2011 (and can be used with) the Search Forum webPage. Our first example will use the alert() method to pop-up a message box that says Hello World! Simply put this javascript in your URL Address bar and hit enter: Code: javascript: alert('Hello World!')...

• Type: Article
• Author: Joel Lipman
• Category: AutoHotkey
• Language: *

SSRS Querying on either of 2 Parametershttps://joellipman.com/articles/microsoft/ssrs/ssrs-querying-on-either-of-2-parameters.html

19 July 2011 dataset query, problem solved… Another workaround exists where if I added the OR part to all my datasets (so where each one says if studentreference is blank then compare to studentadaccount)… Both solutions have the issue where they will return all...

• Type: Article
• Author: Joel Lipman
• Category: SQL Server Reporting Services
• Language: en-GB

T-SQL Record Separatorhttps://joellipman.com/articles/database/t-sql/t-sql-record-separator.html

11 October 2011 the beginning of this article, I am comparing on Day names. The above query generates a last column which is either empty or says "Separator Marker". Based on the CTE above, I now need to add an actual row separating the different days which is either...

• Type: Article
• Author: Joel Lipman
• Category: Transact-SQL
• Language: en-GB

SSRS Retrieving Oracle Stored Procedure Success or ErrorLevelhttps://joellipman.com/articles/microsoft/ssrs/ssrs-retrieving-oracle-stored-procedure-success-or-errorlevel.html

04 November 2011 "executed stored procedure", "please click on the link to continue" and then the user would be taken to a report which says either "Stored Procedure was successful" or "No sorry you're going to have to go back to the beginning and try that again."......

• Type: Article
• Author: Joel Lipman
• Category: SQL Server Reporting Services
• Language: en-GB

How to change local folder for TFShttps://joellipman.com/articles/microsoft/tfs/how-to-change-local-folder-for-tfs.html

08 March 2012 over to your local folder; once done close the dialogs click on the TFS icon in Source Control Explorer and check what it says next to "Local Path" (for me this said the name of the local folder that I specified just before)

• Type: Article
• Author: Joel Lipman
• Category: Team Foundation Server
• Language: *

SSRS: Performance Improvements: SELECT TOPhttps://joellipman.com/articles/microsoft/ssrs/ssrs-performance-improvements-select-top.html

07 March 2014 this runs in 00:00 seconds in SQL Server Management Studio. Not the internal processing and rendering as the report server says it did this in 0.4 seconds. So where's the problem? How? Left to its own devices, a search for "SMITH" as a surname would...

• Type: Article
• Author: Joel Lipman
• Category: SQL Server Reporting Services
• Language: en-GB

Google Drive API v3 - OAuth2 using Service Account in PHP/JWThttps://joellipman.com/articles/google/google-drive-oauth-using-service-account-in-php.html

02 February 2019 - time(); $api['jwt']['token']['minutes'] = floor($diff/60); } 6a. Use existing Access Token This if else statement simply says if the token still has at least 5 minutes left, then use the one found at the file location specified earlier. if(...

• Type: Article
• Author: Joel Lipman
• Category: Google
• Language: en-GB

Zoho Deluge: Search Records with Special Characters (COQL)https://joellipman.com/articles/crm/zoho/zoho-deluge-search-records-with-special-characters-coql.html

28 August 2020 after Zoho is the top level domain (TLD) and will be either .COM, .EU or as per your region. If the first part of your URL says: https://zoho.com/ then use the endpoint https://www.zohoapis.com/crm/v2/coql https://zoho.eu/ then use the endpoint...

• Type: Article
• Author: Joel Lipman
• Category: Zoho
• Language: *

Expecting ZC_SUBFORM_250 expression found COLLECTIONhttps://joellipman.com/articles/crm/zoho/expecting-zc_subform_250-expression-found-collection.html

19 October 2020 is because the Creator Deluge syntax I was using to insert subform rows was wrong. Contrary to what the documentation that says "This task can be used in the following events", effective as of today October 19, 2020, I have not found a place you cannot...

• Type: Article
• Author: Joel Lipman
• Category: Zoho
• Language: *

Zoho Creator: Receive JSON via a Shopify Webhookhttps://joellipman.com/articles/crm/zoho/zoho-creator-receive-json-via-a-shopify-webhook.html

15 July 2021 = Map(); // // enter webhook key featured in the "settings > notifications > webhooks" section beneath the webhooks where it says // "All your webhooks will be signed with.... so you can verify their integrity" (obtained further below in this article)...

• Type: Article
• Author: Joel Lipman
• Category: Zoho
• Language: *